And the new Man Of Steel logo
looks stupid. It looks like my paperback cover of Stephen King’s The Dark Half got together with a comic shop dumpster and Real Steel, and tried to formulate a way to piss me off.
Stop Pt. 2
And I’m not talking about anyone I know. I’m just talking about the internet as a whole. None of my friends post old one sheets of Hitchcock films, or pictures of Boris Karloff in a make-up chair, so I don’t look at your tumblr’s anyway. I’m weird and life is ignoring me right now.
Stop this acronym-ey, all lower-case, no punctuation bullshit. If I wanted to read what a creepy robot computer would sound like before non-consensual sex, I’d hang out at a futuristic factory and try to spill coffee on the keyboards.
The Literary Review: is he FEELING IT OR FAKING... →
“Remember that one time when he didn’t hold your hand, and he made the excuse that he was “in a hurry” and that he was “sorry”? Yeah, that was bullshit. He better keep in step with you as long as you’re together, because if you’re forced to follow behind him even once, the feminist movement dies and you better buy a maid outfit for the upcoming “Beer And Sandwich Sponsored Woman Punching...
Top 10: Zombies With Killer Character →
God bless you, you shark fighting champion. You have courage that I’ll never know.
Whatever A Spider Can: Where Crawls The Lizard →
“Amazing Spidey Quote: Spider-Man: Boy, being a science student sure comes in handy. You could’ve fooled me, Spider-Man. Judging from the way you fight and think, I would’ve assumed that Peter Parker skips class so that he’ll have more time to eat the glue he found in a dumpster.” http://danielsfunny.com/2012/03/25/whatever-a-spider-can-where-crawls-the-lizard/
Whatever A Spider Can: Sub-Zero For Spidey →
“Most of the notes that went into every script probably consisted of Spider-Man dodging out of the way of something falling from the ceiling and then the word “again.” The action is repetitive as soon as it happens the first time, and I’m surprised that scientists haven’t tried to excavate the Spider-Man creative team, in order to see just how a man can live with a brain made of tumors and...
Whatever A Spider Can: The Power Of Doctor Octopus →
“ I didn’t think that you could get different actors to play a cartoon character, but every time Doc Ock shows up, he looks completely different. Sometimes he looks thirty, with a flat-top haircut and sometimes he looks fifty with a shaggy mess on his deformed skull. Sometimes his face seems like it’s melting into its own wrinkles, and the only reason Doc Ock wants to destroy anything is...
A Nightmare On Elm Street 3: Dream Warriors Review →
My review of NOEM 3: DW is up at Yell! Read it and its legitimate qualities and John Saxon-centric humor.
Dating Tips For You and Your Philias: Trichophilia →
“Tip 1: Make your compliments deeper and more weighty. Girls get told “You have beautiful hair” all the time, but you have to go one better than that. Add elaborate metaphors to what you say, such as “Do you remember that part in every movie with The Rock where The Rock takes his shirt off? Girls like abs, right? Okay, well, take that, and inverse it to hair and make it relate to me and you...
Cool Facts To Impress Your About To Be Mediocre... →
I’m going to tumblr it all, eventually. 8/16/11 “But I have examples. Twelve of them! That’s more than 8 of them, which is the age of some kids. And you’re smarter than a kid aren’t you? Yeah. You are. Most things are. Including big dogs and html coding. Kids are dumb. Be better than them, Champ.”
I hold books. Follow me. →
I hold books, ladies.